Pieces of Me
by haze1982
Summary: After the funeral for Remus Lupin's friends, he leaves his life behind. A series of short stories of his life from 1981 until he reappears in POA from Remus' point of view (of course). Written for the "If you dare" Challenge at the Tempest Level (1000 Stories)...
1. Glaciers

**Glaciers**

I never actually thought that day would come. My problem was simple: I got accustomed to the feeling of not being alone. I had my pack. I had Prongs. I had Padfoot. I had Wormtail. A young woman even joined our circle of friendship and trust. There is nothing now. Very much nothing left. The war took it's toil on the lot of us. I stand alone now.

I left that life behind. The man that had done so much for me has no idea where I am. I left in the dead of night promptly after the funeral. I suppose it makes me a coward for running. No family left or friends, I am convinced it's better this way. I'd manage. I always do some way or another. I took what money I had and boarded the ship to go across the North Atlantic. Looking over the vast ocean, it's cold and the glaciers move slowly. They drift ever so leisurely along the sea. You have to really look to see them move from afar but they are moving. Trust me. The glaciers are a giant hunk of ice that's taken centuries to form. No matter the time, anything can be broken. I hate to be the bearer of appalling news.

I rest my elbows on the railing on this enormous ship and stare at them. The water moving them along just as it does me. Drifting along this sapphire blanket that sloshes on the sides. Wherever this giant boat takes me, it'll be miles away from the life I knew and I hope that the pain subsides. I hope that I find something which melts away the icy coldness inside my soul. For now, my tears are as frozen as that glacier that has me entranced, I simply drift with the ocean and wherever it takes me.

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A/N: Written for the "If you dare challenge" Prompt #1 Glaciers


	2. Vague Misery

**Vague Misery**

I found myself somewhere in Northern Ireland. A very small town and the rented room reminds me of the Shrieking Shack. The most haunted building in the United Kingdom. It's been years since a peep has been heard from it. The source of that noise is now sitting with a bottle of cheap wine and a phonograph blaring _Tainted Love_. The other inhabitants don't seem to mind. If they do, I can't hear them. I can't sleep at all. In a few days, I'll change into a werewolf for the first time without my pack. I'll find somewhere to do that. I'll be damned if I invoke this curse on someone else. Throwing back the bottle of wine, the song stops and I rest the needle with a trembling hand to play it again. Over and over again.

"Once I ran to you. Now, I run from you," I sing at the top of my lungs.

"I run from Mad Eye, Dumbledore. The lot of you."

Tilting my head to the side, I start to laugh. The first sign of being insane is not when you talk to yourself. No, no. It's when you answer yourself. Loony Loopy Lupin.

"I trusted you, Pads. I trusted you with my life!" I stare at the newspaper clipping, screaming my bloody head off. The glass bottle shatters against the wall and I hold the _Daily Prophet_ in my shaky hands.

"I gave you all I could give. You took it all."

I let the clipping fall onto my lap and bring my hands up to my face. Tired and quivering as if I'm going to cry. I can't cry. All I feel is numb inside.

The next morning, my head is throbbing as if a thousand small hamsters are running laps inside my skull. The needle on my record player is scratching the shit out of my album. I remember very little of the night before but the misery in my heart is there. A vague misery.

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A/N: Prompt #2 for the If you dare challenge. "Vague Misery"


	3. Moonstruck

**Moonstruck**

The first transformation I've had to go through by myself is now here. I found an abandoned stone building on the outskirts of Belfast. It's away from the masses. I made the extensive passage down the basement and looked out the very small window. The sun is setting rapidly and I have enough time to set up the wards and protect myself, as well as others, with the magic needed to ensure security. Looking around the grey and murky room, I found a loose rock. Prying it up, it is the perfect place to stow away my wand, clothing, and my small duffle bag (after I've shrunk it). Retrieving my chains and manacles, I attach them to the wall quickly and then undress. No sense in ripping the few clothes I do own.

I clasp them on my wrists because I want to make sure that there is no chance of Moony escaping to the streets. Magic in place. Check. Manacles secured. After I tug on them, check. Clothes and belongings safely stowed away. Check. The full moon strikes my face and I take in a deep breath. First full moon without my pack. Unfortunately, check. I throw my head back and scream in agony. The bones crunch. My spine stretches and I howl out into the dead of night. Collapsing on the floor to my knees, I pull my arms around my stomach. This part always hurts no matter what. Before Moony completely takes over, I'm sure I've damaged my knee from the blow to the stone ground.

Every muscle in my body is throbbing the next morning when I awaken. I have so many gashes and cuts across my nude form. It truly is insane. I don't remember a time it's been this bad. I crawl forward on my hands and knees to retrieve my wand from under the stone in order to free myself from my bonds. Scrimmaging in my bag, I take out the few healing potions I could afford this month. I drink them quickly and lift my wand feebly to perform the spell to clean the blood from my body. All I want to do after the moon struck me, none too kindly, is sleep. She is such a harsh mistress. Even the stony ground is comfortable to me and I don't want to move from it to get dressed. Dropping the vials softly into my bag, I close my eyes and fall into a deep slumber.

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_A/N: Prompt#3-Moonstruck_


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